The Missed Generation: Why More Adults Are Seeking Autism Assessments
- Thriving Young Minds
- Sep 3
- 3 min read
Maybe your child has recently been assessed, and as you read their report, memories from your own childhood come flooding back.The teacher who said you were “daydreaming too much.” The playground friendships that always felt harder to navigate. The overwhelming noise of the classroom that made your whole body tense even though you never told anyone.
For many adults, these quiet memories resurface when someone close to them often a child, niece, nephew, or sibling receives an autism diagnosis.
A Generation Overlooked
For decades, autism was understood through a narrow and limited lens. Diagnostic criteria focused heavily on children, often using models shaped around stereotypical presentations. Many adults, particularly those who mask effectively, or who sit outside older diagnostic frameworks were overlooked.
Instead, they were often:
Misdiagnosed with anxiety, depression, bipolar or “personality difficulties”
Dismissed as “too sensitive” or “too intense”
Told to “try harder,” “fit in,” or “stop overreacting”
As awareness and understanding have grown, more adults are recognising themselves in the emerging diversity of autistic experiences. These adults often belong to what clinicians informally refer to as the “missed generation” — people whose needs went unseen not because they were invisible, but because we didn’t yet have the right lens.
As a child and family psychologist, I often see adults seeking assessment after a younger family member is diagnosed.
A child’s assessment can act like a mirror, opening up reflections about your own life and relationships:
The sensory sensitivities you learned to “push through” at school
The energy it took to mask in social situations or at work
The friendships and relationships that always felt harder than for others
The sense that you’ve always navigated the world differently
Understanding neurodivergence across generations doesn’t just help the adult seeking clarity. It can also transform how you connect with your children, support your relationships, and understand your family history.
Living Undiagnosed: What It Can Feel Like
Every autistic profile is unique, but many adults describe similar experiences:
Maybe you’ve spent your life working hard to fit in, carefully observing what’s expected and “performing” a version of yourself that feels safe but it’s exhausting.
Perhaps you avoid certain environments because sound, light, or crowds are overwhelming, but you’ve never felt comfortable explaining why. You might have deep interests or passions that bring comfort and focus, but feel dismissed when others see them as “obsessive.”Or maybe socialising feels like acting from a script where you know the “rules,” but they don’t always make sense, executes awkwardly and afterwards you need quiet time to recover.
Brain Break 🧠
Studies suggest that high-masking autistic adults often show heightened activation in brain regions linked to social prediction and monitoring. Your brain may work overtime to read subtle cues, predict expectations, and manage impressions which explains why socialising can be draining, even when you’re good at it.
Why So Many Adults Went Undiagnosed
Many adults didn’t miss a diagnosis the diagnostic frameworks simply weren’t designed to see them.Some common reasons include:
Older criteria focused on children, missing subtle presentations in adults
Masking and camouflaging, often learned early as a survival strategy
Overlap with other conditions such as ADHD, anxiety, depression, OCD, or eating disorders
Gendered stereotypes, where traits like sensitivity, social withdrawal, or intense interests were misunderstood or overlooked
Recognising these patterns as part of a neurotype can be profoundly validating.
How an Autism Assessment Can Help
An assessment can’t change your past, but it can:
Provide clarity and self-understanding
Reframe long-standing challenges through a neurodivergent lens
Support workplace accommodations and wellbeing
Improve relationships through better communication
Connect you with communities, supports, and resources
At Thriving Young Minds, we take a neuroaffirming, collaborative approach, combining:
Evidence-based assessment tools
Qualitative, narrative-based frameworks ( MIGDAS)
A family-focused perspective that explores neurodivergence across generations
Next Steps.. If you're curious
If these reflections resonate with you, you’re not alone. Exploring your neurotype can be an empowering step, one that brings understanding, connection, and self-compassion.
or get in touch to discuss your next steps or questions you have.
Thriving Young Minds Clinic
Bondi Junction
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